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Being involved with your child's activities is generally a good thing. Going to parent-teacher meetings at school, keeping an eye on who your child's friends are, attending sports events, and making sure that family meals and outings occur regularly all provide discipline, direction, and structure to what could easily be an under-supervised childhood.

But there is plenty of evidence today that too many parents become over-involved in their children's sports activities. In most cases, the intention is good, but the outcome produces an atmosphere in which the child athlete is under pressure to perform for his or her parents rather than participating in sports, regardless of the level, because the activities are fun and challenging.

The Sports Performance Journal asked several experienced experts around the country to give us examples or warning signs of over-involved parents. All of them have children and all have coached at least one sport. If you recognize any of the red flags, consider pulling back a bit and becoming an interested, supportive parent rather than what one expert calls a "helicopter parent" - one who hovers around every activity in which their children participate.

1) Coaching From the Sidelines

"Coaching from the sidelines is a strong indication of over-involvement," says Dr. John Heil, a sports psychologist from Roanoke, Virginia. "The parent is out of his or her role when they start coaching from the stands. That's what the coach is for. It is not even a matter of knowledge. No matter how well informed parents are (unless he or she is the coach), they are making things more difficult. It is challenging enough during competition to listen to one set of coaching instructions, let alone two (or more). And even good advice can be in conflict with the actual coach's plan or philosophy."

2) Criticizing of Officials

"Being too vocally critical of officiating is a bad sign because it can be distracting for all involved, it can irritate the official, and it misses the point that everything isn't always fair, even if people want and try to make it that way. If something needs to be said to a referee or umpire, let the coach do it."

3) Regularly Attending Practices, 4) Over-scheduling

"Over-involved parents are the ones who think they have to be at practice once the child is old enough to be left alone," warns Keith Zembower, M.Ed., a high school teacher in Dallas who has coached several sports at every level from youth leagues to college.

"They plan their lives around the kids' sports schedules - can't miss a game or practice even when there are more important family or school events going on."

Adds Zembower, "Many parents force their children to attend camps, clinics, or sign up for sports without even knowing or asking if their child wants to do it. One other indication: Who does the loss, error, or bad game affect more, the parent or the child?"

5) Wanting Increased Playing Time or 6) a Change of Positions for Your Child

Howard Knuttgen, Ph.D., was a college soccer coach and the former director of the Penn State Sports Medicine Center. He is now a lecturer at Harvard. One of his red flags for an over-involved parent: "I would be concerned about a parent who approaches a coach regarding such issues as increased playing time and the assignment to a position for the child. Another indication is a parent gives indication of disappointment regarding a child's performance after a game instead of encouragement for continued participation and effort."

7) Too Much Talk, 8) Too Much Emotion, 9) Inconsistent Messages

"From my perspective," says Jim Afremow, Ph.D., of the Health and Sport Psychology Clinic at Arizona State, "the three biggest mistakes sport parents make are 1) too much talking about the sport, 2) too much emotion about results, and 2) too much inconsistency in verbal and non-verbal communication. Small changes can make a big difference in regard to these areas. Over-involvement will rob the child of the chance to develop trust in themselves on the field."

Dr. Afremow's suggestions to remedy the problem: "Limit (or avoid) discussions about the sport during the car ride home or during dinner. Ask more questions about the process (What did you learn today? or, What was your high point?) rather than the outcome. Parents may verbally express that they just want their child to have fun while playing, but then get upset when their child's team loses a game. Be a good role model. The behavior you demonstrate will be the behavior your child acquires."

10) Having Your Child's Identity Based on Achievement in Sport

As much as we support youth sports and as much as we encourage young athletes to excel in sports, there is more to life than the next game, match, or event. Our job as parents is to help our children become well-rounded people, not merely outstanding athletes. For the vast majority of them, life after highly competitive youth sports will come sooner rather than later, and they need your help in preparing for that life. Try to walk that fine line between quiet, calm, consistent support and over-involvement that can remove or diminish all of the positive aspects of sports participation.

Dr. Jim Brown is the editor of The Sports Performance Journal, an online publication hosted by Athletes' Performance (AP) from which this article is adapted. AP is the worldwide leader in integrated performance training and performance therapy. The Journal provides athletes and exercisers with research-based, timely, and practical information regarding sports performance, training methods, injury treatment and prevention, nutrition, psychology, and more. SPJ content is based on the expertise and experience of the AP Performance Team and other nationally recognized authorities, and on reports of findings published in scientific periodicals.

The views expressed in the Sports Performance Journal may or may not reflect the views of Athletes' Performance, its performance partners, or the methods that it practices at its world-class training facilities.